I am not shocked by this new development; it’s what Stage IV breast cancer does: It eventually spreads to lungs, liver and/or brain. Ever since my diagnosis last July, I have been in an arc of dying, but treatments try to slow that down. Tomorrow, I begin a new hormone therapy of Ibrance and Faslodex. I also know that tumor marker numbers and scans are only part of this body’s story. How I feel physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually are essential to my medical considerations. And right now, I feel terrific! I hike with Quinn to Peterskill stream; I cheer at Declan’s baseball games; I laugh with Mike during Amy Schumer’s performance in Albany.
Vivre. To live. Live. Liver.
Eliza…just one of the characters our family adores from Hamilton: An American Musical. Despite never having seen this production, it has been our family soundtrack over these past months. Hamilton’s engaging storyline and smart, rhythmic lyrics offer neutral ground for us to explore pathways into our own emotions, ranging from devastating grief to delirious joy.
Really, really, really appreciating your ongoing love and support for me and my family through your messages, cards, gifts, letters, thoughts and help. Thank you.
Mike [rolls over as he wakes up, sees me on my phone]: (groggily) What are you reading?
Me: People’s loving responses to my post from last night!
I share with him how it took me hours to craft the post. That just getting in needed a lot of time, and I finally landed on a LIVER acrostic to shape the text. How the message seemed to ask to be written, because whenever I got hopelessly stuck on another letter, I resignedly started off to bed, and suddenly, the next idea would arrive.
Mike: L – Letrozole, the drug I don’t take anymore.
IV – the thing they stick in me.
ER – the place I go a lot.
Me: (stunned, then riotous laughter) How’d you do that?
Mike [after reading my post]: You can’t use LIVER! No one uses the word in the actual acrostic; that’s a total copout. Mine’s better. [rolls over, back to sleep]