The halls of the Healthcenter are lined with photos of famous Lakers — Kareem, Magic, Big Game, Stumpy, Zeke from Cabin Creek, and Uncle Wiltie. Also the rarest picture in the history of the NBA — Elgin Baylor shooting with his left hand.
John Salley: “I love the Triangle but Tex’s terminology has to change. ‘Line of Deployment’? It’s too warlike. And the guys don’t even ask themselves what ‘deployment’ means. ‘Moment of Truth’? Where I grew up in Brooklyn, that’s what happens every time you unlock your front door.”
Periodically during a break in the game, the screens above the scoreboard are filled with a Sound-O-Meter, which ostensibly measures the decibel level of the crowd noise. Egged on by a close-up of Mickey Mouse’s four-fingered glove-hands clapping, the very appearance of the meter induces a Pavlovian response from the assembled multitude. And even though a full roar produces a decibel level of approximately 95, the Sound-O-Meter invariably tops out at 999.99, a measurement that would instantly deafen everybody in the building.
Pete Carril: “I like the Triangle because of all the passing and cutting. A guy never gets stuck out there, because there’s always a place for him to go. But players have to be able to focus. Like I used to tell my guys when I coached at Princeton, ‘You’ve got to concenfuckingtrate!’”
After the Minnesota game, there’s a hubbub in the coaches’ office. As I push through the door, a ruddy middle-aged man is opening a stainless-steel gold-colored suitcase and setting it down on a table in the middle of the room. The suitcase’s inner lid is cushioned with plump black leather, and at the bottom two sheets of paper are set under glass. The man’s name is Ian Naismith, and the papers contain the original thirteen rules of “Basket Ball” (typed along with some handwritten corrections in blue ink) that his grandfather, the original Dr. J., posted on the door of the Springfield YMCA training center early in the morning of December 21, 1891:
The ball may be thrown in any direction with one or both hands.
The ball may be batted in any direction with one or both hands (never with the fist).
A player cannot run with the ball. The player must throw it from the spot on which he catches it; allowance to be made for a man who catches the ball when running at full speed.
The ball must be held in or between the hands, the arms or body must not be used for holding it.
No shouldering, holding, pushing, tripping or striking, in any way the person of an opponent shall be allowed; the first infringement of this rule by any person shall count as a foul; the second shall disqualify him until the next goal is made, or, if there was evident intent to injure the person for the whole of the game, no substitution shall be allowed.
A foul is striking the ball with the fist, violation of Rules 3, 4, and such as described in Rule 5.
If either side makes three consecutive fouls, it shall count a goal for the opponents. (Consecutive means without the opponents in the meantime making a foul.)
A goal shall be made when the ball is thrown or batted from the ground into the basket and stays there, providing those defending the goal do not touch or disturb the goal. If the ball rests on the edge and the opponent moves the basket, it shall count as a goal.
When the ball goes out of bounds, it shall be thrown into the field and played by the person first touching it. In case of a dispute, the umpire shall throw it straight into the field. The thrower-in is allowed five seconds. If he holds it longer, it shall go to the opponent. If any side person persists in delaying the game, the umpire shall call a foul on him.
The umpire shall be the judge of the men and shall note the fouls and notify the referee when three consecutive fouls have been made. He shall have the power to disqualify men according to Rule 5.
The referee shall be the judge of the ball and shall decide when the ball is in play, in bounds, to which side it belongs, and shall keep the time. He shall decide when a goal has been made, and keep account of the goals, with any other duties that are usually performed by a referee.
The time shall be two fifteen-minute halves, with five minute rest between.
The side making the most goals in that time shall be declared the winners. In case of a draw, the game may, by agreement of the captains, be continued until another goal is made.
The source!
A small edge of each page sticks out at the bottom of the glass, and I ask Naismith if I can touch them. After announcing that the pages are worth ten million dollars, he says, “Sure.”
YESSSS!
I have touched the Holy Grail, and I am blessed beyond measure!
Author, professional basketball coach, columnist Charley Rosen, of Stone Ridge, has had nearly two dozen books published, both fiction and non-fiction. His latest book, Perfectly Awful: The Philadelphia 76ers’ Horrendous and Hilarious 1972-1973 Season is on sale at The Golden Notebook, Amazon and Barnes and Noble.
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